A collection of humorous items I have found over the years. You may recognize some of these from your own e-mail inbox.
Animal Humor
Answers to that Age-Old Question: “Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?” Answered by Some of the Most Famous Persons in History Pat Buchanan: To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American. Colonel Sanders: What? I missed one? The Bible: And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, “Thou …
Entertainment Humor
Top Ten ‘Star Wars’-ish Things to Say When Your Parents Make a Surprise Visit to Your House/Dorm. “Exciting is hardly the word I would use.” “Unexpected, this is. And unfortunate.” Gesture around your room and say to your roommmates, “If they don’t go for this, we’re gonna have to get outta here pretty quick.” Say …
Helpful Humor
Signs You’re Drinking Too Much Coffee You don’t sweat, you percolate. You go to AA meetings for the free coffee. You walk 20 miles on your treadmill before you notice it’s not plugged in. Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down. Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house. Instant coffee takes too long. You …
Holiday Humor
Let’s face it: Once you’re old enough to fall off of Santa’s ‘List’, Christmas can lose some of its magic. It can become a super-commercialized orgy of over-eating, binge-drinking and familial Hell. The following is a list of some ways to give the ol’ holiday a fresh twist. Decorate your fireplace, tree and house with …
Miscellaneous Humor
You were probably born between 1970 – 1965 if: …your ‘dressy’ wardrobe ever centered on pastels and linen blazers: guys included. …you know, by heart, words to any “Weird Al Yankovic” song. …you remember when Madonna was just hitting the scene. …”The Brady Bunch Movie” brought back ‘groovy’ memories. …you ever though “The Reflex” was …
Regional Humor
New State Mottoes for the United States Alabama: At least we’re not Mississippi Alaska: 11,623 Eskimos can’t be wrong! Arizona: But it’s a dry heat Arkansas: Literasy ain’t everthin’ California: As seen on TV Colorado: If you don’t ski, don’t bother Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, only dirtier and with less character Delaware: We really do like …
Religious Humor
Top Ten Things That Would Be Different if the 12 Apostles Had Been Gay The Last Supper would have been brunch. The Beatitudes would start, “Fabulous are they….” Jesus’ triumphant entry in Jerusalem screams for a production number, with ostrich feather palm fronds and a large oyster shell instead of just a donkey. The water …
My Local Astronomy
My Local Weather
Causes & Concerns
